I Was Molested When I Was Thirteen by a Family Member, and I Need Advice/guidance.?
Question by Miss Brightside: I was molested when I was thirteen by a family member, and I need advice/guidance.?
I’m a 16-year-old girl and I was molested when I was thirteen by my dad’s 30something-year-old brother-in-law, and when I told my family, I was looked down upon as a snitch by my molester and his sister, who is my father’s wife. Since my dad was married to the sister of my molester, nothing happened. No consequences. Nothing. I just got a bad reputation. I’ve been so mad lately, and on top of that, I’ve already had some depression problems. I got addicted/dependent on pain medication and often eat sleeping pills or burn my skin to make my erratic anger swings go away.
I haven’t gotten much better at all since then.
Though just two months ago, my uncle (who is my biological mother’s brother) inappropriately made advances towards me and sent me a message about how he had “naughty thoughts” about me. I cried so hard, because I thought I could trust him, and also he revealed this to me on the exact anniversary of me being molested when I was thirteen. I told my mom about this. She got mad at him for a week, and finally nothing happened again. My uncle’s mother came up to me with this disdainful look on her face asking me “What did he even do to you?!”. Before I was a snitch, but now I’m looked at as a liar.
I get so angry that people don’t believe me. I get so pissed sometimes that when I punch walls, sometimes my hands have trouble closing and opening. Sometimes when I try to mask the fact that I’m mad (because punching walls makes way too much sound), I burn a match and try to stab it into the vein in my wrists.
Just because I’m not model-gorgeous, doesn’t mean stuff like this could never happen to me, in the way that my looks are seducing anyone. I’m less than average looking, and that’s why no one believes me.
Ahhh. Well anyway, my main questions are:
How can I deal with the anger in a secretive, more efficient manner?
How can I seek professional help without the consent or knowledge of my parents/guardians?
Best answer:
Answer by Nina
Dear One, Please call: 1-866/920-2952 WEAVE (Women Escapint a Violent Environment)
Another number: 1-800/doncut or selfharm.com
Answer by D.D.
You have the right to be safe in your own home. These molestations are criminal , no matter how many old men, ladies, or people look down their noses at you and ‘dont believe you’. That is just more abuse.
No wonder you are angry. Anyone would be.
the site given at weaveinc.org 18669202952 is a site I give out , where professionals will talk to you and help you make a plan on how to handle this situation.
Here are some more resources
nnedv.org
rainn.,org
ncadv.org 1800799safe
yellodyno.com
girlsinc.org
mariska.com
drphil.com send him your question
You can also ask an attorney tohelp you with this taylorring.com wmlawyers.com
and seek the help of a womens shelter , usually listed in the yellow pages under womens shelters, rape crisis , or domestic violence
You should not be harming yourself over this, because that is just turning your anger in on yourself instead of where it belongs , against the ones who molested you, and the ones covering it up.
It doesnt matter what you look like, it happens to anyone.
Here is a healing method eftuniverse.com click on ‘get started free’ for a free version, read the manual and resource areas on how to apply it.
and therapists eftmastersworldwide.com
You really do need to be heard about this, not take it out on yourself, and find adults that believe you and help you and help you stay safe.
You coudl also take a martial arts class and kick *** if you need to.
You have the right to be safe . youthforhumanrights.org
If all else fails tell the department of social services and the police.
There is no time limit on reporting , so you have time to do this when you are ready. If they have done it to you, they most likely have and will do it again, and came from a home where that happened.
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